Today's Triple News: Fantastic Frozen Sex and where to find it on tape

One does not simply post news on MovieScene and walk away from it:

http://www.moviescene.nl/p/154803/eerste_trailer_sex_tape_online

http://www.moviescene.nl/p/154770/frozen_meest_winstgevende_animatiefilm_ooit

http://www.moviescene.nl/p/154757/fantastic_beasts_and_where_to_find_them_wordt_trilogie

I gotta say, that trailer made me chuckle. That doesn't mean the movie will, as this is basically a thirteen-a-dozen raunchy studio comedy aimed at a predominantly adolescent audience, revolving about sexual (mis)conduct to get the public titillated in advance. There have been many similar movies over the last few years - among them Sex Drive, No Strings Attached, A Good Old-Fashioned Orgy, Zack and Miri Make a Porno, Hall Pass and We're the Millers, though all took a hint from American Pie (which itself hearkened back to material from the Eighties like Porky's, so it's not all a new phenomenon) - and very few of them proved even the slightest bit memorable. As always, the best jokes appear to be in the trailer and once you've seen that, there's little reason to go watch the actual movie. Sex Tape's trailer is running long just under three minutes, so don't be annoyed if you watch it first and the movie second and find there's little surprises left in the film. Or perhaps that's just overly cynical. After all, the cast list mentions Jack Black and Jolene Blalock (T'Pol!) and neither of them is featured in this preview. Maybe they're just bit parts, maybe the trailer does keep some stuff from the final movie from our prying eyes. I reckon Sex Tape is just gonna be an average sexy Hollywood comedy that makes you forget your woes for two hours and remember you have any woes as soon as the lights turn on, because none of the movie sticks to mind for very long. And it's plausible it will do very well at the box office because there's conveniently no other comedies scheduled for that time of the year. Which means we can "look forward" to a second Sex Tape in two or three years time. Just as is the case with the previous movie from this director and his two main stars, Bad Teacher, which turns out to get a sequel nobody asked for. Considering sex sells, expect a trilogy soon.

What also sells (segue!) is delightfully animated family entertainment, and Disney is back on top in that game. Pixar, under the Mouse House's wings, is continuously letting us down creatively, forced to focus on unneccessary sequels, so now the new Walt Disney Studios Animation department can fill that inspirational gap by exploring new ideas and fresh avenues. Or basically doing what Disney always did best, cannibalizing a classic fairy tale of sorts and Disneyfying the heck out of it (though in a bit more modern fashion these days, as it happens to be the 21st century). It's an age old routine that proves as effective and lucrative today as it did before, as Frozen shows. Beating Toy Story 3 from the top spot, there's your new Highest Grossing Animated Movie of All Time. For now, as such records have a tendency to be broken every odd year lately. Blame the studio's increasing insistence on 3D to raise admission costs (again). Or admit Frozen was simply a good movie, a welcome reprieve from Pixar's last few letdowns. And don't be alarmed if you see a Frozen 2 popping up somewhere in the next few years: you don't honestly think Disney can let this success slide without milking more money out of it by pushing sequels on us?

Speaking of milking (another seque! I'm on a roll here!), Harry Potter is over and done with but there's still more dough to be made from the brand name, so let the spinning-off commence! Studio Warner has J.K. Rowling's permission to do so, and even her assistance in fact, as she will pen the screenplay for the first installment of Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them. Even though it remains to be seen whether a coherent story line as gripping as the Potter proper stories can be distilled from what was basically a fun little exploration of the Potterverse that was never intended to be made into a major motion picture, the studio is moving ahead on a trilogy of films. A cautious studio would start with a single movie and see how that works out, but as the blockbuster studio system is increasingly relying on tentpole franchises - and their various spin-offs - to keep itself going, caution isn't something they feel they can afford. So now we'll see whether a Potter movie can do without the actual Potter element, by revealing magic and monsters are enough to keep us going to theaters, or whether it was the life and times of the Boy-Who-Lived himself  that proved the quintessential compelling ingredient of the franchise, not to be omitted so easily on second attempts. If "her" movie fails, this trilogy could come crashing down like a house of cards, so Rowling will have a tough job working her magic a second time.

Oscars 2014: the results

Well, the Academy has finally held its annual ritual, so let's see how many Oscar winners I guessed right. Or expertly deduced correctly, if you prefer.

Best Picture: correct! It seems the time was right for a movie directed by a coloured man to win in this category. This is the Age of Obama after all. Too bad he didn't also win Best Director, but let's not push things, right?
I have yet to see 12 Years a Slave.

Best Actor: incorrect. Matthew McConaughey seems to have been on a roll last year with Mud, The Wolf of Wall Street and the movie he won for, so he was really actively pushing for that Oscar, and successfully so it appears. Though I won't deny him his prize, I feel kinda sad for both Bruce Dern and Chiwetel.
Second choice: also incorrect.
I have yet to see Dallas Buyers Club.

Best Actress: correct! This one just seemed a given. Blanchett deserved a Best Lead win for a change, Best Supporting Actress is good, but just not as good. Woody Allen's recent sex scandal hasn't hurt Blanchett for starring in his film.

Best Supporting Actor: incorrect. I should have known the Academy wouldn't go for a first-time actor, no matter how impressive his performance. Jared Leto proved a more conservative winner, despite him playing a transsexual.
Second choice: also incorrect.

Best Supporting Actress: incorrect. Jennifer Lawrence got her spotlight moment last year and she tripped over her dress while walking the stairs... never again! Plus, 'twas all white folks winning acting awards so far, so this evens the score a little.
Second choice: correct.

Best Director: incorrect. Considering all the technical stuff, I didn't see this one coming. The Academy has a tendency to overlook such aspects of filmmaking when it comes to this particular category, in favor of more trite but true apporaches. No more it seems. Apparently all the technical stuff was just too groundbreaking to ignore for a change.
Second choice: also incorrect.

Best Original Screenplay: incorrect. Poor American Hustle got snubbed good! A story about man and his increasingly accepting mentality towards anthropomorphizing non-human machinery fit right in with appreciating Cuaron's technical stuff. The Academy has finally learned to embrace the digital age then.
Second choice: correct.
I have yet to see Her.

Best Adapted Screenplay: correct! There just had to be a few more wins for 12 Years a Slave to go with that Best Picture win. Right before Gravity took all the rest.

The Academy clearly didn't take a hint from Gravity's tag line.


Best Animated Feature: correct! When Disney gets good again, all other animation is silenced. Like it or not. Let it go.

Best Foreign Film: correct! It just had to be, considering all the raving critical acclaim. Its competitors just didn't stand a chance.
I have yet to see La Grande Bellezza.

Best Cinematography: correct! Duh!

Best Editing: correct! See above.

Best Production Design: correct! Gatsby may not have felt like a great movie, but it sure looked like one.

Best Costume Design: correct! Same.

Best Make-Up: correct! The performances of McConaughey and Leto were undoubtedly stirred to great heights thanks to the way they looked.

Best Music: incorrect. Despite all the innovations, a grand picture still needs a solid soundtrack. Gravity got one.
Second choice: also incorrect.

Best Song: correct! The Academy, too, let it go. Good for them!

Best Sound Mixing: correct! It didn't matter that in space, nobody can hear you scream. For your information.

Best Sound Editing: correct! *insert second joke about the uneasy relationship between space and sound here*

Best Visual Effects: correct! The most obvious winner of the bunch, courtesy of the year's most jaw-dropping sights.

Best Documentary: incorrect. This unexpected pick is the one I take umbrage with the most. There's this hugely unsettling, daringly executed, effectively engaging shock doc about Indonesian genocide, and the Academy opts for a bunch of singing people instead. I'd say they 'let it go' a little too much in this case.
Second choice: also incorrect.

Correct: 14
Second choice: 5-2.
Incorrect: 7

Last year's results: 6 correct, 5 second choices correct and 9 blatantly wrong. There's some personal improvement there!
Most of the choices in the "lesser" categories were just glaringly obvious this year. It was an easy year in that regard. However, the 86th Academy Awards ceremony just proved once again how fickle Academy members can be when it comes to the acting categories. And also just how much the Academy likes to compromise. Then again, American Hustle received 10 nominations and ended up completely empty handed... Maybe because we once again didn't see Jennifer Lawrence's boobs? Oh well, let it go.

Today's Mini(?)-Review: Frozen

Frozen: ****/*****, or 8/10

Say what you will about conservative Disney, there is some form of modernization in progress in that studio. You might even label it a feminist wave of sorts. Frozen marks Disney's first feature length animated film (co-)directed by a woman and only the second whose screenplay was written by such a creature. Not counting Pixar, since then it would have to contend with Brave, a movie where the girl power backfired, as did the quality of the piece as a whole. And while Frozen largely stays within the trite-and-true boundaries we've come to expect from Disney's fairy tale movies, including princesses, charming princes, faraway lands, comedic (animal) sidekicks and plenty of catchy songs, enough of such regularly exploited material is directionally changed to make the film feel as fresh and cool as the imagery the title inspires. Jennifer Lee's directorial debut introduces not one, but two beautiful young princesses, Elsa (voiced by Idina Menzel) and her younger sister Anna (Kristen Bell), heirs to the kingdom of Arendelle. Both are kind, independent and energetic spirits, but the older girl carries a terrible secret: she's basically a mutant with the power to control ice and snow, except she doesn't control it at all, since her fear to wield it controls her instead. She has cause to be afraid of her powers, as she nearly killed Anna at play as a child. Her parents tried to keep her out of harm's way by largely keeping her confined to her chambers, much to the dismay of her sister, who had her injury and memory of the incident erased by a nice wizard troll (this is a work of fantasy, need I say more?). After the death of their parents and the coming-of-age of the elder sister, a coronation takes place where Elsa is crowned queen and where Anna – hilariously – meets her apparent groom-to-be, the latter event uterly disrupting the former as Elsa unwittingly gets pushed so far she sparks an endless winter that covers the entire kingdom in frost. Fleeing the palace to built her own on a high mountain precipice where she finally starts to accept her powers in her moments of isolation, Anna is determined to bring back her sister and get her to undo her unintentional damage to the realm, which leaves her land vulnerable to the shady ambition of certain visiting foreign dignitaries. Accompanied by a simple but reliable young backwoods man named Kristoff, his carrot obsessed reindeer Sven and a wacky living snowman named Olaf, Anna sets out on a tough voyage to reunite with her wayward sister and bring summer back to Arendelle. And, in typical Disney fashion, to discover True Love in the process. But not in the usual sense of old.

Frozen proves a worthy successor to the similarly themed, equally wonderful Tangled (2010), which also re-established Disney's formidable talent to craft charming, adventurous and romantic fantasy films for all ages after over a decade of creative drought, as well as updating its female characters to the 21^st century, a time in which the main focus of a woman is no longer a man to marry (but also not excluding the possibility as not to upset the traditionalists in the audience). Frozen introduces two solid female characters who care first and foremost about eachother, though one of them does not allow herself to show said fact. Both women are sizzling with recognizable character flaws and strengths, familiar emotional family conflict and the talent to burst into song, so despite their ultimately antagonistic nature (though the traditional 'good versus bad' set-up is carefully avoided in their strained relationship), you root for them and their sibling affection both to survive against all odds. Simultaneously, while the sterotypical good looking prince to wed is not an image to be discarded, it develops into quite another direction than is usual, and the expected notion of cheesy True Love messages doesn't end up covering the usual sexual connection between boy and girl. The voice cast delivers impeccable acting and shares an audible chemistry, standout performances including a hilarious Scandinavian tradesman (jå!) and Olaf, the token sidekick, who is not nearly as irritating as he could have been and actually warms everybody's heart with his simple but unattainable desire. Similarly enjoyable are the clan of stone trolls, Kristoff's surrogate family, a group of Smurfesque creatures with the ability to succesfully camouflage themselves as rocks, and who unfortunately don't nearly have as much screen time or background exploration as we would have liked. And if you're afraid the reindeer talks (since animals with the ability to speak are an oft dreaded Disney staple still), fear not: his master does so for him to witty, almost self-reflective results. The songs are a welcome return to tradition; though for a moment at the start of the film they seem to comprise most of the dialogue, better balance to the music is applied later on. Apart from pleasing the aural senses, Frozen offers a delightful visual feast as well with its wondrous winter landscapes and ever present snow motifs, but considering the darkness of many scenes coupled with the obligatory 3D effect, not all the imagery ends up looking as amazing as it could have been. However, many of the 3D shots in the lighter scenes hit their mark, especially those involving snow and icicles, so seeing the 2D version instead isn't wholly recommended either.

In a time where Pixar is increasingly going down the drain creatively because of its lack of inspiration and its current focus on prequels and sequels, a thoroughly wonderful and ideologically original pure Disney film like Frozen is a welcome sight. Even the coolest minds and the coldest hearts will find it hard not to melt due to this film's built-in warmth, and with the dominant motif of snow and ice, Frozen proves to be a perfect Holiday movie for old and young alike.