Ted: ****/*****, or 7/10
These
last few years, bromance is the new key word in comedy movies.
The number of movies focusing on a bunch of guys, the closest of
friends, getting in and eventually out of trouble (often female
related) by being there for one another to the point they seem to
love each other more than they do their girlfriends, has been
steadily on the rise with no apparent end in sight. Of course, the
routine of the subgenre, all too firmly established by now, begs for
some variation. Enter Seth MacFarlane, the man behind the popular
animated sitcom Family Guy, who came up with an idea as simple
as it is effective, while appearing utterly ridiculous to the
uninitiated at first: replace one of the dudes by a living teddy bear
while otherwise staying true to the bromance formula. The
result, as both written and directed by MacFarlane, is a delightful
comedy film, that explores the boundaries of bromance by
wedging a fairly random element between the love affair of an
everyday guy and the girl he loves, an obstacle as male as the other
guys usually intervening in the natural progression of romance as
portrayed in this particular subgenre, but certainly not as human.
Despite Ted's abundance of effectively funny moments, it must
be said Macfarlane does stick to the bromance theme a little
too much, too often ignoring the fact we're watching a live stuffed
animal parading on the screen, instead concentrating on the way he
both hinders and helps the romance between his best buddy and his
girlfriend as if he were just a regular guy.
Applying
Patrick Stewart's ever reliable voice talent to the role of the
story's narrator, Ted opens on the unavoidable fantasy note
necessary to explain how a three ft. teddy bear came to life in the
first place. We're introduced to the protagonist, John Bennett, in
his past as the least popular kid on the block, a boy so generally
scorned other kids won't even bother to beat him up. To remedy his
isolation a little bit, John's parents give him a big plush teddy
bear for Christmas which instantly becomes his best buddy in the
whole world. Wishing the bear were alive, he quickly finds this
desire becomes reality, courtesy of a shooting star passing over at
the exact moment he made the wish. Despite his parents' initial
objections – they're freaked out by this talking toy, as any adult
would be – John can keep Ted and they grow up together. Of course a
live teddy bear is as extraordinary a thing in this movie's universe
as it would be in our own, and when discovered by the media, Ted
swiftly becomes a celebrity, only to fall into general acceptance and
eventual obscurity as his novelty wears off and people grow tired of
him. It doesn't matter for Ted, since he'll always have John, his
best friend for life; and as John grows up into a likeable, nerdy
adult (now played by Mark Wahlberg), Ted grows up with him into an
equally nerdy, grumpy know-it-all bear with a rather vulgar attitude.
These boys may have grown up together, but both of them have remained
immature, despite the fact John at least got himself a job and a
girlfriend, Lori (the ever charming and witty Mila Kunis).
Warning!
Spoilers! As is the standard problem the plot of most typical
bromance films offers, the main question for John in Ted
is how he can get serious in his relationship with Lori while still
being able to maintain his less than serious, and indeed kind of
childish, relationship with his oldest pal, if this is even possible
at all. As is the case with most regular guys, John picks romantic
love and the future it offers over brotherly love and staying stuck
in watching (bad) movies and smoking pot for ever: and so John
finally decides to move on with Lori, promising her to start acting
more responsibly and stop living the hedonistic life with his bear,
after he has helped Ted start a life of his own, living at a place of
his own and getting a job of his own, much to Ted's chagrin. If the
character of Ted wasn't a stuffed toy, there would be little
originality to this film's story. However, he is, which makes the
gags involving him applying for a workplace and hooking up with one
of his new colleagues all the more hilarious. Finally moving out of
John's place makes him less a guy and more a toy, underscoring the
silliness of having a teddy bear look for a job, hosting drunken
parties and abusing illicit substances, to great effect, resulting in
a string of memorable scenes that are sure to get those mouth muscles
moving in uproarious laughter, as is supposed to be MacFarlane's
forte.
Unlike
the official poster of the movie – which features John and Ted
using the urinals, the latter holding a beer bottle – would have us
believe, Ted isn't driven solely by toilet humour,
illustrating definite heart and soul in its characters, human or
otherwise. On the other hand, it certainly isn't afraid to embrace it
either, walking an ever fine line between hilarious, sexually charged
witticisms and cheap, cringe worthy poop jokes: the film contains
both, but luckily the former prevails over the latter. Nevertheless,
such trash talk has become as much a staple of comedy over the last
few years as the other comedic element driving the humour in Ted,
which is the constant referring to celebrities or movies in an often
less than respectful tone. As is the case with most of MacFarlane's
work, Ted is laced with popcultural citations, varying from
the compulsory references to Star Wars to making fun of celebs
a lot of spectators will have a hard time remembering (I of course
know who Tom Skerritt is, but do you?). Quoted most often is Flash
Gordon (1980), a personal cult favorite of John's, and by
default, Ted's. Flash Gordon star Sam Jones gets to play
himself as a worn out movie star that has fallen into utter obscurity
(which isn't far from the truth), idolized by the pair of them, and
all too eager to get drunk and do a little too much drugs with them
(like I said, bromance), with dire consequences for John's
relationship with Lori, making her break up with him. This of course
also results into a conflict between Ted and John, which successively
ends up in an stupendously funny fight scene between the two of them.
However, when Ted afterwards gets kidnapped by a mentally troubled
man (the wonderful, underrated Giovanni Ribisi adding yet another
well performed but disturbing character to his diverse repertoire)
with a creepy fat kid – one of the few cases in the plot where
Ted's status as a living toy is of paramount importance instead of
negligible – John and Lori must reconcile to get their friend back,
at which point the movie adds some uncomfortable action scenes to the
overall piece, largely in detriment to the sense of comedy which
dominated the film up until this point. At least it's filmed in a
visually slick and fairly suspenseful fashion, keeping our mind off
the sudden lack of humour for a good fifteen minutes.
When it
comes to visuals though, Ted rules his movie. Being the product of
computer animation via motion capture and voice artistry, both done
by MacFarlane himself, the teddy bear looks and sounds as real as the
plot claims him to be. Though maybe not so intricate as Gollum or
King Kong, Ted is a rather impressive piece of CGI, at all times
making the viewer forget he's watching a bunch of pixels and feel
he's a real person when interacting with genuine actors. Given the
scale issues involved, that is quite an accomplishment for a director
who is unfamiliar with techniques and technology like this, but
obviously not with animation itself. It also helps MacFarlane has
assembled a fine troupe of actors to help him convince the audience.
Mark Wahlberg, who's often less than compelling in his performances,
does a surprisingly good job as a childish, nerdy guy even though he
does not look like one (which is a refreshing image to say the
least), visibly enjoying anything MacFarlane throws at him, including
the fight scene with the plush toy that ends with a television
crushing his genitals. As his opposite, Mila Kunis equally delivers
in her role of the beautiful and sensible girl who is truly in love
with John but who would desperately like to see him get rid of Ted,
without hurting him of course, so they can finally get serious for
real. MacFarlane's own performance as Ted completes the trio driving
this picture, and it's safe to say it's all for the best he took the
responsibility of breathing life into his own creation, despite also
carrying the burden of writing, producing and directing the film,
since few other actors would have understood Ted like he does,
successfully making the teddy bear both endearing and worth the
audience investing in him as a character, despite his often raunchy
and rude behavior.
However
accomplished a comedian and performance artist he may be, MacFarlane
proves he's less talented when it comes to the fantastic parts of the
movie. It isn't until the end of the movie, as Ted is accidentally
torn in half by his kidnapper, at which point Lori saves his
existence by wishing he was alive again, that we truly start to
question the logistics of the fantasy part of the plot. The film goes
out of its way to state how special a little boy's wish, made at
exactly the right moment in time, can be, but in the end it appears
everybody can make a teddy bear come alive when coincidence takes
over (it's a little too convenient from the audience's perspective to
attribute the circumstances to fate alone). It makes you wonder why
Ted is the only living toy around in MacFarlane's world, since the
desire to make toys come alive has tormented children for centuries.
Though in the end it doesn't truly matter how Ted came to be what he
is, MacFarlane's haphazard writing in this regard only hurts the
plot's credibility. It might have been preferable if MacFarlane
ignored the exact how-and-why of Ted's existence altogether, even
though that too might have raised uncomfortable questions in the
audience.
Overall,
as a comedy Ted is largely successful, despite the fact its
most stand-out feature – Ted himself- is not the driving force
behind the film's plot. While Ted is naturally a key component, it's
still all about John, and the story revolves around his attempt of
balancing his life with Ted and his love for Lori equally. Therefore,
Ted is less about a live teddy bear trying to cope with the
real world and more about a guy trying to make room for the love of
his life while still aiming to keep in touch with his best friend as
much as he would like to. In this regard, bromance wins over
“bearmance”, though the audience would have loved to see more of
Ted's life on his own and his status as a washed-up celebrity which
in many respects deliver the most moments of hilarity. Maybe the
story would have been better off if the roles were reversed and Ted
was the protagonist instead of John, realizing you can't stay
immature together for ever and at one point, even as a living toy,
you just have to move on with the woman you love and loosen your
relationship with your best buddy a bit. Considering Ted's
happy ending (mostly for John and Lori) leaves ample room for Ted's
character to be further developed on his own, it's not unlikely we'll
be seeing more of him in the near future, also taking into account
Ted is doing huge at the box office, mostly because of the
lack of other appealing movies available for viewing in theaters at
the moment. 2012 witnessed a great movie summer, with the promise of
an equally great finale in its last few months, but the period
in-between is plagued by a shortage of films appealing to a wide
demographic, except for this one; it will come as no surprise Ted
2 is already a work in progress, and hopefully a sequel will give
Ted his due: after all, despite the charms of this introductory
piece, it's not truly about the teddy bear, though we obviously like
to see him the most. Maybe we can trade in Mark Wahlberg for Sam
Jones altogether for the next film? After all, you can't keep true
bromance down.
And
watch the trailer here:
