Today's News: trailers for everybody!

Been a busy week, here's some trailers that kept me posting:

Nieuwe trailer Minions

Everybody seems to really love the Minions. Even though they don't have much material going for them just yet. I guess the chief ingredients for success are all present in these little servants of evil: they're small, they're numerous (but just diverse enough to set them apart), they're colour coded in a simple fashion, and they're excessively cute. It worked for the Smurfs, eh? But unlike the Smurfs, they're supposedly evil, and I have yet to see any hard evidence of that. Of course, you can't sell evil to kids. So whatever villainous scheme they're involved in usually ends in failure, at least in Gru's case. It's obvious the evilness is just a pretense to get some silly story going, often interspersed with random gags (e.g. the teddy bear for example), while the main goal is to sell the Minions' cuteness to the audience so people will want to buy Minion dolls and stuff. I doubt things are gonna be any different in this semi-origin story. There's just a new baddie, who'll soon find hiring the Minions was a bad idea (that's what explains the badness of the Minions I suppose). No matter to us, as long as the Minions trollop around the screen looking utterly cute in all their zany, goofy shenanigans

Teaser Magic Mike XXL

Female audiences are gonna end up pretty satisfied in the erotic department this year. At this moment, everybody is moaning and groaning (either out of sheer lust or sheer loathing) over Fifty Shades of Grey, and in the not too distant future, that scenario will repeat itself with this second Magic Mike movie. I will not deny looking at the sweaty, undressed male torsos produces a sense of sexually insecurity for me, and I know that goes for most male audiences. The majority of those are of course dragged to theatres by the various women in their lifes (except for the homosexual portion of the populace, no doubt). Being a single man, I cannot help but wonder what tension Magic Mike hath wrought in the bedroom after a visit to the cinema. Do women press their men into trying to physically appear more like him, or do they accept that such an impressive bodily look is the exception rather than the rule? If we ignore the story line in effect for the film (which is not hard to do, since it's so overtly basic), what's left is largely nude men doing sexy dances to arouse women, which is basically softcore porn. I'm not judging, just stating the obvious. I hope the target audience realises full well that that's just all it is. But then, do men watching regular porn take the time to consider it's all just fantasies, too? Movies like Magic Mike XXL do a good job of reminding us just how small the difference between men and women actually is.

Eerste trailer Marvels Daredevil

This is more my cup of tea. Sure, there's a few good looking men (and women) in this production, too, but there's a lot more story to it. I enjoy ogling the well trained bodies of the opposite sex as much as anyone, but I prefer a good story. Too bad it's not a new story for the most part, but the previous audiovisual incarnation of Daredevil left plenty of room for improvement. It seems this new Netflix series delivers just that. This teaser also makes no mistake this is definitely going to be Marvel Studios' darkest production so far, and thus a certain amount of blood and violence is not spared. Good thing too, if they want to set the upcoming Defenders miniseries apart from the merrier, more colourful Avengers counterpart on the big screen. Sure, the following series are likely to be a bit lighter in tone, but since they all deal with fighting street crime and mob practices in New York's less pleasant neighbourhoods, some level of violence feels mandatory. Far be it from Netflix to shy away from that. For those who don't enjoy such grim superheroes, rest assured things will only brighten up after this. And if it's still not what they're hoping for, they'll always have the actually cinematic part of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. No sinister sex crimes and gruesome drug wars there, only evil robots hellbent on annihilating humanity or intergalactic bad guys threatening the existence of the universe.

Nieuwe trailer Furious 7

And if you like action but not superheroes, you might consider checking this out. The typical 'get-rich-or-die-tryin'' atmosphere of fast cars and hot people (male and female) engaged in gunfights and general fisticuffs. A successful formula, so much so we've reached the whopping seventh entry in the F&F franchise. The actual death of a major player couldn't stop this production, yet there's a sense of finality to this trailer. All of Toretto's racing rivals have been added to his inner circle, his family. And now their bond will be put to the final test when the bad guy threatens to kill that family. Of course, it will prove a stupid idea and the villain will no doubt soon discover his folly. Since the merry gang of highway brigands is already rich since the fifth film, it's not about racing for money anymore, but racing for the ties that bind. And fondly remembering those ties in case of the fallen actor. For the studio however, money definitely still is the objective. So it's not inconceivable we'll be seeing more of this family in the future after all, even though it feels we're hitting an emotional climax here.

Jovovich speelt hoofdrol in Martins In the Lost Lands

And then there was this bit of non-trailer news. Of course, anything that has George R.R. Martins signature on it would be considered gold by studios hoping to cash in on the success of Game of Thrones. Doesn't mean everything Martin ever wrote is nearly as good as his most successful work. You wouldn't think the same genius was behind the majority of episodes of the second season of the Eighties' Twilight Zone show, considering their poor quality. At least In the Lost Lands is likely to appeal to the same (vast) fanbase since it's written in the same genre of epic fantasy. I had never heard of these stories before, but reading the synopsis doesn't convince me yet on whether adapting them to the big screen is a good idea. I may be entirely wrong, as I'm not familiar with the outcome, but the stories seem to lack coherency, while their protagonists seem to be subject to random elements, especially in the case of the story with the witch and the spacecraft (or maybe combining such seemingly incombinable elements is just proof of narrative brilliance beyond my comprehension). I probably should either read those stories or shout up about the topic and have faith in Martin. That said, I cannot help but wonder whether it would not be more prudent to adapt these shorts for television rather than the big screen. If they are indeed separate stories of an episodic nature, television seems suited for them. Anthology story telling isn't something you often encounter in theaters, maybe for a reason. Then again, it wouldn't be the first time Martin broke with conventions. Since GoT proved he excels at that, maybe I should simply reserve final judgment until In the Lost Lands hits cinemas.